
How to Divorce Without Going to Court in Maryland
September 4, 2025When a marriage or long-term relationship ends, it’s not only the bond between partners that is affected as family ties often fracture, too. One of the more complicated dynamics involves how to handle your relationship with your former in-laws, particularly when they are also the grandparents of your children.
Whether your relationship with your in-laws was warm, strained, or somewhere in between, navigating this evolving connection during separation and after divorce can be emotionally and legally complex. In this article, we offer both practical advice and Maryland-specific legal considerations to help you thoughtfully manage this delicate transition.
Before the Breakup: Setting the Tone
In healthy relationships, extended families often play a central role in the couple’s daily lives. Grandparents provide childcare, attend school events, host holidays, and offer emotional and sometimes financial support.
Even before a separation occurs, you may begin noticing subtle shifts in these dynamics, such as distance, divided loyalties, or unsolicited advice. If tensions begin to rise in your marriage, try to resist turning your in-laws into confidants or adversaries. Maintaining appropriate boundaries during this time can preserve goodwill if separation does occur.
If you and your spouse have children, remind yourselves and your in-laws that your children’s emotional stability depends on preserving healthy, supportive adult relationships around them—including with grandparents on both sides.
During Separation: Focus on the Kids, Set Boundaries
The separation phase is often the most uncertain and emotional. Legal arrangements may still be pending, emotions can run high, and extended families frequently take sides.
During this time, set clear and respectful boundaries with your in-laws. It’s okay to decline invitations or limit communication if it protects your peace or prevents conflict. However, if your children have a positive relationship with their grandparents, try not to interfere with that connection unnecessarily.
In Maryland, unless there is a court order, grandparents do not have an automatic legal right to visitation. However, they may petition the court for visitation if it is in the best interest of the child. Courts in Maryland are cautious with such requests and generally defer to the parents' judgment unless there is clear evidence that visitation is necessary for the child’s well-being.
As you develop a temporary custody or visitation schedule, consider how grandparent involvement may be addressed. If your child is spending weekends or holidays with the other parent, the grandparents may naturally have time with the child during those periods without your involvement or oversight. If needed, your attorney can help you draft a temporary agreement that includes guidelines for third-party contact.
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After Divorce: Decide What Relationship You Want
After a divorce is finalized, the nature of your relationship with your in-laws may be forever changed, but it doesn’t have to be hostile or non-existent.
If you co-parent effectively with your ex, maintaining a cordial relationship with your former in-laws may benefit your child and create a more stable environment. In some families, grandparents continue to play a very active role, attending school events, birthday parties, and even spending time with the child during your custodial time (with your consent).
But this is your decision. If past interactions have been toxic or disrespectful, you are under no obligation to maintain contact. If the grandparents’ involvement undermines your parenting or creates emotional stress for your child, you may need to take firmer steps, including legal ones.
What If Grandparents Push for Visitation?
Maryland law allows grandparents to file for visitation, but the burden is high. Our Maryland Court of Appeals has reaffirmed that fit parents have a fundamental constitutional right to determine who sees their children. This means courts will generally side with a parent who denies grandparent visitation unless the grandparent can prove that the child is suffering harm without that contact.
If your in-laws threaten legal action or have already filed a petition, speak with a qualified Maryland family law attorney right away. These cases are fact-specific, and you’ll need tailored legal advice to protect your rights and your child’s best interests.
Practical Tips for Managing the Relationship
- Keep the child’s well-being front and center. Let your child enjoy their grandparents if the relationship is safe and loving.
- Set boundaries. Communicate clearly what is and isn’t acceptable in terms of contact, opinions, and involvement.
- Avoid conflict in front of the children. Keep adult issues out of their earshot.
- Use written agreements when needed. Include language about grandparent access in your parenting plan if appropriate.
- Get legal advice early. Don’t wait until things escalate.
Final Thoughts
Managing your relationship with former in-laws, especially when they are your children’s grandparents, is rarely simple. Every family is unique, and emotions can run deep. But with thoughtful planning, clear communication, and trusted legal guidance, you can make decisions that protect your peace and your child’s well-being.
If you are facing questions about custody, visitation, or extended family dynamics during a Maryland divorce or separation, we are here to help. At Baumohl Hamburg LLC, we understand the legal and emotional complexities of family transitions. Let us help you protect your rights while keeping your child’s best interests at heart.
Call us today at 443.940.2000, email us at harry@bahalaw.com or schedule a confidential consultation online. Let’s find the best way to move forward.
Serving families throughout Maryland in divorce, custody, and family law matters.
Disclaimer: The information provided in this article is for informational purposes only and should not be construed as legal advice. It is always recommended to consult with a qualified attorney for personalized guidance and representation in legal matters.
About the Author
Harry A. Baumohl, Esq., a founder of Baumohl Hamburg, LLC, stands among Maryland's elite family law practitioners, bringing: Over Four Decades of Proven Excellence; Established track record in complex family law matters; Strategic location serving Baltimore County and surrounding jurisdictions.
Specialized Expertise in High-Stakes Family Law Cases
- Complex divorce litigation for high-net-worth and high asset individuals and families with sophisticated asset division and financial untangling.
- High-conflict custody and parenting disputes.
- Prenuptial Agreements, Preventive Planning, Mediation and Collaborative Law solutions.
Distinctive Approach to Client Representation
- Results-driven methodology backed by decades of experience and success.
- Strategic thinking combined with emotional intelligence mixed with calm, measured guidance during turbulent times.
- Proactive communication and responsive client service.
Geographic Reach
- Primary office in Pikesville, Baltimore County
- Active practice throughout: Baltimore County; Baltimore City; Carroll County; Harford County; Howard County & Anne Arundel County.
Ready to benefit from Harry's unique blend of experience and strategic thinking?
- For Clients:Visit our website at BahaLaw.com. And for direct access feel free to schedule a confidential consultation to discuss your family law matters. Direct access to seasoned counsel who understands the complexities of Maryland family law. Harry@BahaLaw.com.
- For Professionals: Our firm welcomes strategic partnerships with attorneys and other professionals seeking experienced Maryland family law counsel for their clients. We offer comprehensive case collaboration and maintain the highest standards of professional service. For referral inquiries: Harry@BahaLaw.com
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