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Infidelity is one of the most emotionally devastating experiences a spouse can face. Whether you’ve noticed subtle behavioral changes or dramatic shifts in communication, finances, and intimacy, the possibility of an affair raises painful questions, and often, significant legal concerns.
Although Maryland no longer recognizes adultery as a standalone legal ground for absolute divorce, the conduct of the parties during the marriage, including infidelity, can still influence custody, support, and property division. For individuals in high-income or high-asset marriages, the stakes can be even higher, especially when secrecy, financial misconduct, or debt has occurred alongside the affair.
Below are 10 of the most common signs of infidelity we see, what they may indicate, and how Maryland law may treat these issues in a family law matter.
1. Sudden Changes in Communication or Emotional Availability
If your spouse becomes distant, more argumentative, or highly guarded with their personal schedule or emotional openness, this may signal a shift in attachment. Emotional withdrawal is often one of the earliest indicators of infidelity.
From a legal perspective, communication patterns can also impact custody evaluations if the behavior affects parenting involvement or emotional stability.
2. Hidden or Changed Phone Habits
Signs may include:
- Password-protecting previously accessible devices
- Keeping the phone upside down or constantly on silent
- Increased late-night texting or messaging
Technology is one of the most common vehicles for infidelity. Maryland law prohibits unlawfully accessing someone’s private messages, emails, or accounts, so do not attempt to break into devices, accounts, or cloud backups. Instead, speak with a family law attorney about lawful ways to preserve digital evidence if needed.
3. Unexplained Absences or Frequent “Work Trips”
If work hours, dinners, or overnight trips suddenly increase, especially without prior notice or documentation, there may be more going on.
Timing matters. If a spouse is consistently unavailable to participate in children’s activities or routines, it may raise concerns in a custody analysis about prioritization and parenting engagement.
4. Changes in Appearance or Personal Grooming
Sudden investment in new clothing, perfume, grooming habits, fitness routines, spa visits, or cosmetic procedures, especially when paired with secrecy, can be a warning sign.
While physical change alone doesn’t prove infidelity, unexplained personal transformation combined with other behavioral changes may contribute to a larger pattern.
5. Financial Irregularities or Hidden Transactions
This is especially important in high-asset marriages, where more complex financial structures can mask spending.
Red flags may include:
- New credit cards or accounts
- Cash withdrawals outside normal patterns
- Unexplained hotel, restaurant, or travel charges
- Transfers to unknown Venmo, Zelle, or PayPal contacts
In Maryland, evidence of marital waste or dissipation, such as spending marital funds on an affair, may be considered when dividing assets. A court may compensate the non-offending spouse by adjusting the property award.
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6. Secretive Online Behavior or Multiple Social Media Profiles
Infidelity today often originates online. Separate social media accounts, encrypted messaging apps (including WhatsApp, Signal, or Telegram), or locked photo vault apps may suggest attempts to conceal communication.
Again, avoid accessing private accounts without consent. A Maryland attorney can help determine whether lawful spouse-supported discovery or subpoenas may be appropriate.
7. Loss of Intimacy or Dramatic Shifts in Sexual Behavior
Changes in intimacy, either decreased interest or sudden unexplained increases, may indicate emotional or sexual involvement outside the marriage. Combined with other signs, this can point toward an affair.
While Maryland does not usually punish the conduct of adultery itself, marital behavior may still be evaluated when determining alimony, credibility, and the overall context of the relationship breakdown.
8. Protectiveness Over Personal Time and New “Hobbies”
Working late, weekend outings, or unexplained new interests can be innocent or indicative of time spent with someone outside the marriage. If your spouse refuses to share details, becomes defensive, or excludes you from long-standing routines, it may reflect a deeper issue.
9. Defensive or Accusatory Behavior
A spouse engaged in an affair may:
- Blame you for trust issues
- Accuse you of being controlling or jealous
- Express a sudden interest in "privacy" or independence
This behavioral reversal is often an emotional strategy to deflect suspicion.
10. Your Instinct Tells You Something Is Wrong
Many clients report that the most consistent sign wasn’t a concrete fact but rather it was intuition. If the relationship feels different, distant, or disconnected, it is worth paying attention.
What To Do If You Suspect an Affair — Maryland Legal Guidance
If you believe your spouse is being unfaithful, avoid confrontation until you have guidance and clarity. Many individuals, especially in high-income households, make costly mistakes, such as attempting to record conversations, accessing accounts, or moving money.
Instead:
- Document financial concerns discreetly
- Avoid retaliatory behavior
- Do not move out unless legally advised
- Speak with a Maryland family law attorney early
You do not need proof of infidelity to begin planning or protecting yourself. In fact, early legal consultation can prevent the loss of financial records, dissipation of assets, or strategic positioning against you.
How Infidelity May Affect a Maryland Divorce
Even though adultery is no longer a formal divorce ground, it may still matter in:
- Custody determinations if the affair impacts parenting judgment, consistency, or emotional well-being.
- Alimony, especially if the unfaithful spouse diverted marital assets to support the affair or caused significant financial harm.
- Property division, particularly in cases of dissipation, asset concealment, or inequitable spending.
In high-asset situations involving business ownership, executive compensation, real estate holdings, or trusts, the financial impact of infidelity may be significant and legally actionable.
Considering Your Next Steps
If you’re noticing several of these behaviors, you may be facing an affair or a spouse preparing emotionally and financially to exit the marriage. You deserve clarity, stability, and legal protection.
Contact Our Firm
At Baumohl Hamburg LLC, we help Maryland clients, particularly in high-asset and high-income marriages, navigate the emotional and financial impact of infidelity with discretion, strategy, and strength.
If you’re concerned about changes in your marriage, we’re here to help you understand your options before taking action.
Schedule a confidential consultation today.
Disclaimer: The information provided in this article is for informational purposes only and should not be construed as legal advice. It is always recommended to consult with a qualified attorney for personalized guidance and representation in legal matters.
About the Author
Harry A. Baumohl, Esq., a founder of Baumohl Hamburg, LLC, stands among Maryland's elite family law practitioners, bringing: Over Four Decades of Proven Excellence; Established track record in complex family law matters; Strategic location serving Baltimore County and surrounding jurisdictions.
Specialized Expertise in High-Stakes Family Law Cases
- Complex divorce litigation for high-net-worth and high asset individuals and families with sophisticated asset division and financial untangling.
- High-conflict custody and parenting disputes.
- Prenuptial Agreements, Preventive Planning, Mediation and Collaborative Law solutions.
Distinctive Approach to Client Representation
- Results-driven methodology backed by decades of experience and success.
- Strategic thinking combined with emotional intelligence mixed with calm, measured guidance during turbulent times.
- Proactive communication and responsive client service.
Geographic Reach
- Primary office in Pikesville, Baltimore County
- Active practice throughout: Baltimore County; Baltimore City; Carroll County; Harford County; Howard County & Anne Arundel County.
Ready to benefit from Harry's unique blend of experience and strategic thinking?
- For Clients: Visit our website at www.BahaLaw.com. And for direct access feel free to schedule a confidential consultation to discuss your family law matters. Direct access to seasoned counsel who understands the complexities of Maryland family law. Harry@BahaLaw.com.
- For Professionals: Our firm welcomes strategic partnerships with attorneys and other professionals seeking experienced Maryland family law counsel for their clients. We offer comprehensive case collaboration and maintain the highest standards of professional service. For referral inquiries: Harry@BahaLaw.com
